Friday, January 12, 2007

Mo Science


This is too funny! Unfortunately,,,, real. So, say "Goodby" to NASA in the utopian caliphate.


"
Abd Al-Baset Al-Sayyid: When British colonialism or the British kingdom were in control, and it was “an empire on which the sun never sets,” it imposed Greenwich Mean Time. This creates two problems for the world. The first problem is that in Greenwich, the magnetic field of Earth is 8.5 degrees, whereas in Mecca the magnetic field is zero.
[...]
.
Interviewer: Before the break, we talked to Dr. Abd Al-Baset about the centrality of Mecca, and about the importance of measuring time according to the latitude of Mecca, and not according to the latitude of Greenwich... Why is it?
.
Abd Al-Baset Al-Sayyid: It has been proven that there is a certain discrepancy if we calculate it according to Greenwich. This discrepancy has been estimated as 8.5 minutes between the northern and southern hemispheres.
.
Interviewer: How much?
.
Abd Al-Baset Al-Sayyid: 8.5 minutes. Air traffice cannot be organized this way. They are aware of this, and so they try to change it.
.
Interviewer: Really?
.
Abd Al-Baset Al-Sayyid: Yes. If they calculated time according to Mecca, it would be the same in the northern and southern hemispheres.
.
Interviewer: Surely they know this...
.
Abd Al-Baset Al-Sayyid: Yes, but we have to work on these things. We must declare this, and we must convene a large conference with them, and tell them that time must be calculated according to Mecca.
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Interviewer: What other benefits are there to calculating time according to Mecca?
.
Abd Al-Baset Al-Sayyid: If you calculate time according to Mecca, those 8.5 minutes... The magnetic field of Earth, for example... What I say is that there are people at the North Pole and the South Pole who cannot come here in multitudes.
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Interviewer: Really?
.
Abd Al-Baset Al-Sayyid: This is because the magnetic force is concentrated there, which affects people’s blood and the biological movement of life. It has been proven that if magnetism, anywhere, exceeds 1,000 gauss, which equals one tenth of a tesla, it affects the ability of the hemoglobin in the blood to carry oxygen to the body’s tissues, the ability of the blood to carry oxygen to the tissues.
.
Interviewer: In other words, the ability to live...
.
Abd Al-Baset Al-Sayyid: Yes, to live... This means is that when you are in Mecca, the ability of the blood to carry oxygen to the tissues is greater than anywhere else in the world.
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Interviewer: That’s why, when people travel to Mecca, they return full of energy.
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Abd Al-Baset Al-Sayyid: In Mecca, you don’t exert any effort. That’s why you may see an old man, who cannot walk, or who walks with crutches, and even though it gets very crowded around the Ka’ba, he is filled with great strength, and he circles the Ka’ba. You do not exert any effort, and you are filled with energy, because you are in a place in which there is no magnetic force.
[...]
Anybody who studies human chemistry knows that all circulation in the human body is to the right. All the components are called “dextro-rotatary,” which means circulating to the right. They call it dextro-rotatory, which means circulating to the right. When I’m circulating [the Ka’ba] from right to left, anti-clockwise, I increase my body’s circulation, and consequently I am filled with energy.
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Interviewer: I get filled with energy too?
.
Abd Al-Baset Al-Sayyid: Yes, because the right-to-left circulation in my body increases."

20 comments:

The Merry Widow said...

Bwahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!
And they think they are soooooooo advanced? Excuse meeee! I think it's along the same lines as the sun sets in a mud puddle, and satan lives in your nose... LOL!
The illogic and silliness of their musings is risible!

tmw

kuhnkat said...

Where can I subscribe to these comedy shows?!?!?!?!?!?!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Eyes said...

Crazy huh? Apparently science and the koran don't mix...

nanc said...

that's too much - in labor the doctors tell you, if you must, to lie on your left side (where most peoples' hearts are...) as it it makes circulation and labor easier.

gee - who knew their hearts were misplaced?!?

::multi-faced::

Eyes said...

Hee, hee,,,, I'm sure it has something to do with the missing 8.5 minutes. *gag*

Brooke said...

Whew! Eyes, my sides hurt now!

Crazy Muslims...

Eyes said...

Hi Brooke, It is funny isn't it? There's nothing worse than a person with an IQ of 70 who thinks they know everything.

Urban_Infidel said...

"In Mecca, you don’t exert any effort."

Because heads just fall off by themselves.

Eyes said...

Hi U, ...and from the looks of what ideas are brewed up in the heads.. it's no great loss!

The Merry Widow said...

Heck, they may still roam around for a few hours looking for their heads! LOL!
As a bio major with a little master's level courses...they are really hilarious!

tmw

Eyes said...

I've heard chickens do that...

The Merry Widow said...

The chickens have a better excuse! And it's only for a few minutes, but they can!

tmw
Nanc-There is a large vein that runs down your trunk, if you lay on your right-side while pregnant, and sometimes your back, youcan cut off circulation which causes fainting and nausea!

nanc said...

eyes? labor is ugly no matter WHAT you do - i prefer c-section, having had one and the other two natural.

The Merry Widow said...

I had c's for both, the second was planned, so I got a good night's sleep, and recovered faster!

tmw

Eyes said...

I think there's several conversations going on at once... No?

nanc said...

funny how that happens!

The Merry Widow said...

Huh?

tmw

Eyes said...

Blogs are somewhere between telephone conversation and email...

Snail mail
Email
Telephone
Face-to-face

kevin said...

Easter Bunny, Santa, unicorns...they all live in Mecca!

Eyes said...

Well, anyone who would believe islam is the religion of peace after reading the koran, would believe anything...